A discussion that took place on British Mummy Blogger this week shows that no matter what decision you make concerning your feeding choice everyone makes the decision that they think is best for themselves and their baby.
There is no totally right or totally wrong, but just mothers wanting to do what’s best for their babies.
The testimonials that you are about to read illustrate that idea. There is no judgement, no lessons given to others, but just experiences.
I hope you enjoy reading these as much as I did. And if you want to submit a new post, please contact me directly.
Here we go!
Breast VS Bottle -just my story
“So if I had to choose breastfeeding or bottle feeding, I’d say take each day as it comes and do what feels right for you and your baby.”
Breastfeeding was something I never really thought about when I was pregnant with my son. I was very naive if I’m honest. What is deemed to be the most natural thing in the world to do, I assumed would be just that. So imagine how frustrated I felt when after 4 days of screaming, crying and stressing, my husband sat me down and said “our son is hungry, you’re knackered” and out came a freshly sterilised bottle of formula milk. I felt like a failure and I couldn’t watch him have his first bottle feed because it broke my heart.
When I think back to the days I spent in the hospital, I remember asking for help from numerous midwives to the point I felt like I was being a hindrance to them. This was made even more apparent when 1 of them felt the need to say “you’ll need to learn to check it yourself”. I also found they weren’t singing for the same hymn sheet, making it even more confusing. If he fell asleep at the breast should I take him off or wake him up? Which breast should I start the feed on? How long should I let him feed for? Is he latched on properly? Every time a different answer. Needless to say I was very confused!
Read the rest of the story at Yummy Mummy, Flabby Tummy
I am not a member of the Breastapo
“I came close to giving up many, many times but for me with Toddlergirl, breastfeeding became my totem, the thing I could do for her that nobody else could.”
I’ve been really saddened over the last few days to have people assume that, because I breastfeed, because I trained as a mother supporter and because I have set up our local breastfeeding support group, I am some kind of militant breastfeed or else type.
And even worse to discover that they haven’t shared their difficulties and worries with me because they assumed I would judge and dictate what they should do and potentially make them feel guilty because of their decision. I can’t even start to express how much that saddens me.
Because how wrong could they be.
Read the rest of the story at Muddling Along Mummy
How I almost gave up breast-feeding
“When embarking on being a mum to a small baby for the second time in my life, I felt pretty darned confident that breast-feeding would come easily.”
Most of you will know that I am rather pro-breast-feeding. While I won’t criticise you for deciding to formula feed, I will offer lots and lots of advice and tips if you’re undecided or having problems (which, let’s be honest, probably comes across like sanctimonious criticism). Most of you will know that I breast-fed Rosemary for over two years. Most of you will know that I felt myself to be a bit of an expert at the old breast-feeding lark, though not a trained breast-feeding counsellor.
So, when embarking on being a mum to a small baby for the second time in my life, I felt pretty darned confident that breast-feeding would come easily. She would latch on the second she was put on my chest after birth and there would be no positioning problems, no need for Lansinoh, no cracked or bleeding nipples, no mastitis, no topping up with formula. None of the problems we had last time. Because I was breast-feeding mum extraordinaire, who lived through many a tooth and gave her eldest daughter absolutely the best and healthiest start any child could possibly have.
You see where we’re going with this story, of course?
Read the rest of the story at WAHM – BAM!
The ever growing debate: Breastfeeding or Formula?
“Call me selfish if you like, but I just didn’t want to breastfeed!”
Nicola Mc Lean is my hero! Not that I want to look like a peroxide blond with breasts the size of watermelon and with Barbie legs… although I could most certainly deal with the Barbie legs. The boobs? Been there (size of watermelon) hated it and got rid of it (explanation later).
Why is Nicola McLean my hero? This morning she appeared on GMTV with Lorraine Kelly to explain why she was never going to breastfeed… woooohh… very sensitive subject I know. Especially if you know that most people will judge her from the fact that she is; what? A Big-Boobies-Blonde-Page-3 girl? Well maybe… does that mean she is a hair head? Well, maybe not.
Read the rest of the story at Perfectly Happy Mum
“But for me the problem was in my head, by that I mean I was becoming depressed.”
Nothing like a bit of controversy of a morning. The news today about new research suggesting that actually formula fed babies are not any worse off than breast fed ones has touched a nerve I’ve tried to put behind me for about 7 months.
If only Professor Sven had done his research then maybe I could’ve been spared weeks of anguish over being a bad mother. Lots of women try and find they can’t do it for one reason or another (mastitis, latching on problems, thrush etc). But for me the problem was in my head, by that I mean I was becoming depressed. I found it harder to bond with my baby whilst feeling like this. I just can’t explain how low and dismal I felt about it all.
Read the rest of the story at IT’S A MUMMY’S LIFE
The right time to give up breastfeeding?
“Its a difficult decision and one that only I could make.”
This week I have made the big decision to give up breastfeeding Lara. That it has coincided with my return to work was not the plan, it just kinda happened.
It has been fun – I’d highly recommend it. I’m not a breastfeeding evangelist, but I do feel that every mum who can, should give it a try. If it works for you and your baby then it’s a wonderful bonding experience, considerably less labour-intensive than bottle feeding, less expensive and biologically, its the most natural way to go. I think I was one of the lucky mums to whom it came naturally; other than that first emotional week, there have been no real problems.
Read the rest of the story at Mellow Mummy
“I made the choice to care for my child in the only way I know how.”
A friend once lamented to me that there were a ton of things she felt very strongly about whilst pregnant, all of which got tossed in the trash when she actually had a baby.
In my case, breastfeeding tops that list. I was committed to nursing, I truly was. I hadn’t even bothered to buy a pump, so sure was I of my ability to offer my child milk directly from the source. Being stuck in a chair during growth spurts didn’t sound so bad; the breastfeeding books made this sound rather idyllic, a time where I could relax, unwind, read a nice novel or catch up on last season’s Weeds. Pumping so that my husband could give our baby a bottle and let me sleep through a night feeding? Eh, why bother? How hard could it be to roll over and let the little one (who was sure to be cuddling next to me in my bed,, another example of fantasy that reality kicked in the shins – my child was NOT into co-sleeping) partake? All the literature had me convinced that this would be a rewarding, intuitive process. Sure, there might be some cracked nipples; it might take some time for me to feel comfortable nursing in public; but all in all, I assumed this would come naturally to me. Just as the books said, this was the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding! So That’s What They’re For! (Yes, these are actually book titles, I kid you not.)
Read the rest of the story at The Fearless Formula Feeder
“All that wonderful, peaceful boob time and the bonding we shared over her meals seems a bittersweet memory now that I’m at work for eight extremely long hours…”
As a professional Graphic Designer and new breastfeeding mommy, I must say, THIS is a striking example of effective design. Use that white space like you mean it! Oh Yeah Babe!
It’s day three of baby in daycare and having spent the last three months successfully breastfeeding I’m sore and beat down on this whole pump at work thing. I’m tired, miserable and missing the crap out of my munchkin. All that wonderful, peaceful boob time and the bonding we shared over her meals seems a bittersweet memory now that I’m at work for eight extremely long hours attaching myself regularly to a lifeless plastic milk sucker. Literally, this SUCKS!
Read the rest of the story at Kahlan’s Kapers
“He loved his bottles so I expressed as much as I could every day and gave him what I could. It lasted for about two weeks until my milk ran out. I had given him a good start…”
My baby is 12 weeks old today. He is bottle fed.
There have been a lot of babies appearing in blog and twitter land the past few weeks and even a couple in real life too (well my real life if you know what I mean). It is lovely, who doesn’t love to hear about a new baby but there has been a flip side to it for me. Feelings of jealousy and anger that people got to have the birth experience that I wanted, people that have found breastfeeding easy, those that have persevered and have found their way. Please do not misunderstand me. I am filled with wonder and joy and love for these people and I do not wish to take anything away from their experiences but I have found myself in tears on many occasions over the past few weeks and I need to do something positive about it. So I have decided to write about what happened after Piran was born, and my struggles with breastfeeding. I am also going to go and talk about my induction and labourwith a midwife at the hospital (although I have to wait for an appointment).
This will be a long post I am afraid. Hope you can stay with me.
Read the rest of the story at A Place of my Own
“I lay down in bed and cuddled my son. I lay him on the bed next to me, and he started to feed. That was the beginning.”
There’s been a lot written about breast v bottle over the years, and GMTV has been stirring up the debate again lately. I don’t want this post to be a lecture about which is better, but the story of my personal struggle.
When I was 21, fresh from Uni, I had an operation I had been waiting a couple of years to have. I was desperate to have a breast reduction for lots of different reasons. I was warned that the operation might inhibit my ability to breastfeed and although they’d do their best to avoid cutting through the milk ducts, there would be no guarantees. At 21, this seemed unimportant to me; I had no plans to have children in the near future and vaguely pushed the idea to the back of my mind as something I would deal with later. Breastfeeding would not be a big deal to me.
Flash foward 10 years to 2005. I’m now 31 and pregnant. I have changed a lot over the last 10 years and have different priorities. During my pregnancy, it becomes clear to me that a natural lifestyle is important to me, and breastfeeding my child is high on my agenda. I begin to worry that the operation 10 years earlier will prevent me from doing this.
Read the rest of the story at Barefoot Mahala
“Two days before Christmas, my mum informed me that her Christmas dinner guests (her included? not sure) did not want me to breastfeed in front of them.”
Looks like we had a great time! Well the day itself didn’t run so smoothly. Let me explain why.
I wish I’d been brave this year and stayed at home with my little family. Instead, I went to my mums and had to play by other people’s rules. Two days before Christmas, my mum informed me that her Christmas dinner guests (her included? not sure) did not want me to breastfeed in front of them. (As we all know, breastfeeding is a shameful secret and should be hidden away. Want to give your child the best possible start to life? By god, shush, don’t tell anyone.) With one guest in particular to be avoided at all costs. And pay? Gosh did I.
Read the rest of the story at All Grown Up…
Ten things I’d forgotten about breastfeeding
“Maybe if I’d remembered them I’d have chosen the bottle? Only joking.”
This is the third child I’ve breastfed (and no they’re not hanging round my knees now, before you ask). Despite that, I can’t remember much about breastfeeding. For example, I’d forgotten that:
Read the rest of the story at Babyrambles
I Have Not Failed
“I just wish that there could be EQUAL education about all forms of feeding so that there isn’t a feeling of FAILURE if you can’t do what is so heavily promoted.”
This is my gorgeous daughter when she was just hours old. She looks quite peaceful there, doesn’t she? But this was a lull in a rather rocky start together. After an overnight stay for induction at 41 weeks +5 days which led to 27 hours of non-productive labour, an Emergency Caesarian and a massive loss of blood on my part we didn’t get that DREAM BIRTH that most mothers wish for. The skin-to-skin and immediate latching on never happened. Actually, the latching on never, ever happened.
Read the rest of the story at Cafe Bebe
Notes from Motherhood: Breast is Best, except when it’s Not!
“One of the reasons for me writing this post is to illustrate just how difficult it is to breastfeed.”
We all know that Breast is Best, of course it is, otherwise what on earth is the point of being a mammal?
But what if for some reason you can’t breastfeed your baby?
The World Health Organisation actively promotes breastfeeding as the best source of nourishment for babies and it is understood that support for mothers is essential. This excerpt is taken from their website:
Breastfeeding has to be learned and many women encounter difficulties at the beginning. Nipple pain, and fear that there is not enough milk to sustain the baby are common.
Read the rest of the story at Born Free
“I know at all cost breastfeeding should be promoted but what about the needs of bottle feeding mothers?”
I read a article in a magazine recently on bottle feeding and how there is a lack on information on it.
I totally agreed with it. There is a lack of information available before and after you give birth on bottle feeding.
Whilst pregnant I was told everything you needed to know about breastfeeding & I gathered information on breastfeeding from magazines and books.
I did plan on breastfeeding from the moment I found out I was pregnant. I decided too as I knew it was what best for my baby & that it was free! 
Well once Oli was born my plan to breastfeed went out the window. Oli just didn’t want my breast milk. He wouldn’t latch on or even show a interest in wanting too.
Read the rest of the story at Me, The Man and the Baby
So good to read both sides of the story, and everything in between! It’s sad that something that should be so natural, feeding a baby, can be so emotive and divisive. If you can and want to, surely hurrah, and lucky you. If you can’t, for whatever reason, then lucky you too for having a hopefully content baby. Thanks for all of these, lots to recommend to others.
Thank you very much for your comment and I am happy that you enjoyed reading these posts!
This is really enlightening. Thanks for the great article on this matter.
I really appreciate your thoughts and ideas but mother is a mother and she’ll not give up because she lover her baby.
Some people simply can’t breast feed. I had no milk at all :’(
Angel
http://www.highheelsandlipgloss.com